firsts...

I wrote my first poem when I was seven:

Guess what I had for tea
Fish and chips with one pea
I ate too much
I've never had such
and I died with a belly-ache in me.

I wrote my first book around eight. It was called "Bad Jelly the Witch by Spike Milligan". It was a paperback. It was my favourite book. I copied the whole thing out in pencil in an exercise book. I thought that's what writing was: the act of writing. Of course my little naive self was correct, in a way.

I saved my first dollar in ones and twos. I danced and jumped through the hall in a fit of euphoric glee. I was rich.

My first bike was a 'conqueror'. Noone else had a 'conqueror'. I loved that bike. It was blue. My friends had bmx's. They were yellow. One bot had an hmx. It was green. I loved my bike. I never wanted a bmx. Everyone wanted to ride my bike.

My first kiss was behind the toilets at Cooks Gardens in Wanganui. It was organised the day before. It was a 'pash...with tongue'. It lasted eleven seconds. I know because we timed it.

My first copulation was with the same girl, three years later.

My first 'drink' was a big brown 'lion brown'. I stole it from the crate in the garage while mum and dad were hosting a party in the vale.

My first drug was a spot of oil. My sister showed me what to do. I was eighteen. I've always been a 'late bloomer'.

My first 'taste' was opium. I'd just been dumped over the phone. I left little piles of vomit in my room and walked into the lounge in our Dunedin flat. My flatmates were shooting up. I'd always said no to that shit. I said yes, and with the loss of an old love, found a new one.

My first drug withdrawal was three months later. It didn't take. My first drug treatment was three years later. It didn't take.

My first fight was with my best friend. I didn't know how to fight. I threw sand in his face. The kids cheered.

The first time I saw my dad cry, he told me his dad died.

My first performance was in "The Nobodies From Nowhere", at the 'Four Seasons Theatre'. I was not supposed to be in it. I was five. My mum took me as a treat. I had to be up there. I jumped onto the stage and would not leave. I remember the laughter.

My second treatment was at Odyssey, 2008-2010. It took a while, but it finally took.

This is my first blog.